So my 7 year old can’t tie her shoes. Is this as shocking as it seems? I don’t know if anyone else can relate to this. It wasn’t until I started dating the wife that I even realized that my child cant do this. Now days all her adorable shoes that come from either Puma or Nike come with Velcro. Am I really that clueless of a Mom that my child has not learned one of the most basic skills in life??
So today is the day. We have put a hold on all other activities until she learns this vital skill. Both the wife and I went through the shoe lacing process approx 109283 times. She was still stuck at the first step. I truly was beginning to think that I should call child protective services on myself. Who forgets to teach their kid how to tie their shoes?
We had to run errands in town so we brought a shoe with us. One of the kids light pink chuck taylors. So we ran and met a guy about an ipod whilst she’s in the backseat practicing on this shoe. Still no success. She kept getting frustrated; tears were cried. Next stop was the Lexus dealership…
Yes, thats right. The wife bought be a fucking Lexus today. She is all about safety and the car I got has never had a single fatality. She came in her pants instantly upon learning of this information. As we are pulling into the dealership, I hear a cry from the backseat…”LOOK LOOK!! I DID IT!!”
I turn around to see this little converse shoe with a cute little bow on top. Holy shit, the kid did it. I was so proud and surprised at the same time. I felt like a super mom even though I really played no part in her success. If it were up to me, she would prob be shitting in diapers and walking with a cane, and NOT tying her shoes.
She was able to repeat this feat several times while waiting on the paperwork that needed to be signed at the dealership. It was pretty cool to watch her go from having no clue what she is doing, to mastering a skill.
So after a million hours, I finally got to drive away in a brand new Lexus. I may complain a lot about issues in my life but I really do love and am grateful for what I have. I can bitch about absolutely anything, but not today. Today the woman I love bought be a car, my kid tied her shoes, I am eating my favorite pizza right now, and NO ER FOR ANOTHER 3 DAYS! Life is good.